She has left us for a year now but deeply inside me I still feel sad and misses her so much. Looking back into the year, things did change. If you ask me if did it change for a better one, honestly I really do not know. I still miss the old days when she is around nagging and scolding us. Now, the house seems quiet after both my sisters got married and moved out. It became silence when my brother went further his studies in Australia.
Ok ok, agree that both my kids isn't the quiet kind of kids. Wanted to thank my mother in law for staying over at my house to look and care for them. Or else Tracy and I will be stressed like hell. Anyway, the kids growing fast and quite a quick learner. They still yell and scream all over the house but there were times before they go to bed, they will say....
"Daddy, Mommy... I misses MaMa (grandma) very much"
"Is Mama looking over us all the time?"
Though my eyes are dry but deep inside my heart, I'm still crying and hurt. Is she really looking over us? If yes, will she be sad too when she sees me sad thinking of her?....... life is really hard but I got to hang on and hang strong for the kids and family.... I hope I could do it.